I awoke to the tolling of bells:
the ancient clanging,
the mystic jangling
of the heaviness of bells
in my heart.
Deep did the brassy throat call
to me
in spectral salutation:
ghostly yet familiar,
like the ashen, expressionless face
of a love departed.
Did I sleep through the changing of tides,
eternally swelling
estuarine telling
of the age-old story of tides
in my heart?
Long did the briny voice sing
to me
in reedy exultation,
mud-caked and gasping
for the rush of reversal,
the moon’s invitation.
Did the bells mark the turn of the tide,
the bright pealing
in concert sealing
the wet desperation that cried
in my heart?
Somehow the brine and the brass
intermingled
in living dissonance,
resounding through empty canals,
flooding my memories forgotten
with the warmth of the weight of the water.
3 Comments
24 September 2007 at 7:04 pm
This places delicate and beautiful imagery in my mind. I love the timing of your voice and cascade of nostalgia.
Also I would suggest editting the word “the” out of your piece as much as possible, for it is repetitive and distracting to real words.
Props,
Diana
25 September 2007 at 7:58 am
powerful. thick with charm.
27 September 2007 at 7:49 am
I want to be like you when I grow up…
It would be an interesting experiment to try Diana’s editing suggestion – post the re-write and get feedback through the process…
It didn’t so much distract me, but it may work…